I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
