I smell stomach acid.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I just want nice things and good sex
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
