peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
