Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
