It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Sorry about my life...
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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