i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
