scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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