she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize