I am full of burrito and curiosity
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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