im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Randomize