Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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