It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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