How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
