I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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