I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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