I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Girls should come with a carfax report
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize