Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
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As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
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I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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