I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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