I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
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