And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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