Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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