I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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