we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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