I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Too much gin, very little bucket
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize