Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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