i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Randomize