Its about making memories worth repressing
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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