He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
