We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
