Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
