i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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