if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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