I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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