just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize