Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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