I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Acid is not a monday night drug
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
