My room smells like vodka and shame
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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