I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
