Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
