Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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