So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize