His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize