He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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