Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(314): View more from Missouri

I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(314): I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found http://tfl.nu/6w2n

Replies (0) Good night (885) Bad night (1037)
Favorite
(202): View more from Washington, DC

if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(202): if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think http://tfl.nu/ufei

Replies (30) Good night (1636) Bad night (1334)
Favorite
(919): View more from North Carolina

guys are only as good as the porn they watch

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(919): guys are only as good as the porn they watch http://tfl.nu/x0jq

Replies (71) Good night (4142) Bad night (1342)
Favorite
(954): View more from Florida

can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(954): can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future? http://tfl.nu/6a5x

Replies (5) Good night (3466) Bad night (1129)
Favorite
(819): View more from Quebec

Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?

(604): View more from British Columbia

Each and every day.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(819): Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough? (604): Each and every day. http://tfl.nu/71fx

Replies (16) Good night (4728) Bad night (1091)
Favorite
(320): View more from Minnesota

For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(320): For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates. http://tfl.nu/jze3

Replies (19) Good night (1512) Bad night (4188)
Favorite
(708): View more from Illinois

I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(708): I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie. http://tfl.nu/rjzr

Replies (6) Good night (4620) Bad night (992)
Favorite
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(832): either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes http://tfl.nu/ezez

Replies (5) Good night (951) Bad night (3753)
Favorite
(604): View more from British Columbia

You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(604): You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people http://tfl.nu/m3p8

Replies (11) Good night (3815) Bad night (1232)
Favorite
(438): View more from Quebec

Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(438): Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it http://tfl.nu/s0ms

Replies (10) Good night (830) Bad night (3543)
Favorite
(740): View more from Ohio

Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(740): Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday http://tfl.nu/hztn

Replies (5) Good night (1848) Bad night (744)
Favorite
(419): View more from Ohio

He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(419): He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk.. http://tfl.nu/th8z

Replies (12) Good night (2813) Bad night (725)
Favorite
(810): View more from Michigan

He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(810): He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me. http://tfl.nu/paz8

Replies (24) Good night (3220) Bad night (795)
Favorite
(931): View more from Tennessee

In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(931): In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure http://tfl.nu/hlh0

Replies (2) Good night (721) Bad night (443)
Favorite
(660): View more from Missouri

So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(660): So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that? http://tfl.nu/jwyz

Replies (1) Good night (269) Bad night (104)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard