I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
