Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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