so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
