I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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