Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I heard we made out
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
