Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
