I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Come see our sink grown plant.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
